Welcome to another installment of Burning Question, where it’s your turn to share your thoughts!
A couple of days ago on Facebook, I saw an interesting conversation about Project Life on Christine Newman aka Listgirl‘s FB page that went something like this:
Random Male FB Friend: Hobbies shouldn’t be causing you anxiety. The moment it stops being fun… stop. My $0.02.
Christine: Tell that to every scrapbooker. I don’t know any scrapbooker that doesn’t feel some kind of anxiety or guilt about NOT scrapbooking, or even scrapbooking.
Which got me thinking…
Why is it that scrapbooking and guilt seem to go hand in hand?
Guilt trip notepad from ModCloth
I’d say just about every scrapbooker could tell you that it does, but why is that?
Is it due to the time-focused nature of scrapbooking? Is it somehow a female-based trait (since men don’t seem to have these same reservations)? Or is it simply something that has become accepted as a part of scrapbooking culture?
I admit despite my best intentions to keep my scrapbooking relatively guilt-free, there are definitely times when I feel like I’m not doing enough. Which is kind of crazy because shouldn’t I be playing by my own rules?
So I’m curious to hear from you!
Do you suffer from scrapbooker’s guilt? Where do you think this whole crazy idea of scrapper’s guilt comes from? And what can we do to banish guilt from our scrapbooking once and for all?
Oh heck yes I have scrapper’s guilt. I think it comes from the fact that this is such a personal hobby. It is not like a sport where you can leave it on field, we are living our hobby every day! Memories are made every day whether you scrap them or not. And the compelling need to be finished or caught up. The solution? Not sure but I have recently discovered art journaling and that is a guilt free hobby. I guess just learning to let go is the most important.
That is totally true about memories being made every day. Maybe we all need to think of it more as a process or cycle rather than something you finish or get “caught up” on. Great thoughts!
Good question! My initial thought was “it’s because we are women”. I do have guilt, everything from “I have more pictures of the girl than both boys combined” “I have not scrapped the oldest hardly at all because he was pre-digital images” “I could spend my time working out/cleaning/working instead” ” I could be saving the money I spend instead.
In the end, I whole heartedly believe that if it enriches your life and brings you joy and does not consume you to the point of neglecting life then it makes you a better woman/friend/wife/mother/person. And if you are leaving a good journal and meaningful words for future generations, even better!
I totally agree! I think it’s hard not to put pressure on yourself to keep things fair – I think that probably is largely a female trait.
Hey! This has been on my mind lately (obviously). I think it’s good to step back and really think about and analyze about the WHY of scrapbooking for yourself. Once you figure out why you scrapbook, you can decide what your goals are, and try to have less guilt. For my Project Life album, I have figured out that my goal isn’t just photos and journaling, because I have that on my blog already. I like to play with the scrappiness and craftiness of it. Well, then my goal of finishing my weekly pages in 2 hours is unreasonable. Something has to give, right? The trick is to balance the goals and find something that works for THAT week.
LOL, hope it was ok I used you as inspiration! Haha! I totally agree about balancing your goals with what works. It’s so easy to get caught up and not really stop and think about what matters most to you. I like to start big projects with the final result in mind & ask what I’d be most happy to capture. Then I focus on that. Good luck with your Project Life album – way to go for keeping up all these weeks already! I’ve loved seeing all the extras (like the tickets!) you’ve been adding to it!
I think that’s why Project Life has become so popular. So many people feel like scrapbooking is memory keeping, and as has already been said, new memories are made every day. Am I really going to remember that after my baby spilled the garbage can that my 2 year old picked it up (without being asked) because there was garbage everywhere, and then had to wash his dirty hands after placing everything back into the garbage? Yet those are the kind of things that I tell my husband when he comes home from work. Those moments will be forgotten unless they are recorded (or randomly become commonly told family stories that somehow last generation to generation). Yet it’s those little moments of watching my son make a mature decision that bring happiness to my days full of kids who spill garbage cans. Those are the moments that I cherish as a mother, and those are the moments that everyone tells me go by too fast.
Now, maybe I should have prefaced that I am NOT a chronological scrapper, nor am I anywhere near “caught-up”. So obviously getting myself into a scrapping/blogging/picture taking and organizing flow has been on my mind lately. I try not to feel guilty because it adds unnecessary pressure. And technically, because I AM making an effort, more memories are being kept than if I weren’t. Maybe that’s bad logic, but I’m ok with that. I like having it be a hobby versus a job, so I’ll keep it that way for now.
What I find so interesting about the explosion of Project Life is not the everyday aspect of it – I totally love that – but that it’s pretty much the ultimate in chronological focused scrapbooking, at least in the way it’s intended with weekly spreads. I’ve never been a chronological scrapbooker and never felt any guilt about being “caught up” but when I attempted Project Life last summer, I definitely felt that pressure to keep up and it kind of ruined it for me even though I loved everything else about it. Will be interesting to see where things evolve from here. Great comment!
I think if we look for it, there’s always something to feel guilty about 🙂 Not just with scrapbooking.
I’ve been thinking about this a lot, and what I do feel a lot of it regret–like regret I didn’t take more photos of myself in high school, regret I don’t have more photos with my mom, that kind of thing.
Do I feel scrapbooker’s guilt? I honestly don’t really think so, because scrapbooking started out as a creative outlet for me. It’s only in recent years (maybe 2010?) when I started using it as a way to tell stories, though not in chronological fashion–I was still scrapping whatever photos I wanted to scrap. I don’t really like scrapping events or holidays, haha.
And I think I’d subconciously decided, long ago, that my memory-keeping would be my photos and random blogging. And now with Facebook, Twitter, much of my life (mostly online but also offline) is recorded. And then now I use the Momento app on my iPhone and Instagram and then do my Oh Life entries, so I know I’m recording what I can. I know a lot of people feel the same way about Project Life. I remember being tempted to try it, but knowing myself, it wouldn’t be simple for me. I would stress over it.
I think ultimately, I just want scrapbooking to be a creative escape for myself, rather than an obligation I feel I should do because I want to record our memories. (Let it be said, though–I don’t have children. I wonder if my perspective will change once I do. :))
See I wonder about the no child aspect of it too because this is pretty much exactly my philosophy as well. I don’t really ever feel guilty for not scrapbooking something specific (and I never do events or holidays either, haha) since I tend to view my layouts as more of a creative outlet/journal that’s primarily for me. In fact, my mom once looked through some of my printed layouts and it felt a bit like she was reading my diary, hahaha. I only ever really feel guilty about projects that go unfinished but that’s not limited to scrapbooking. I do wonder though if having kids changes that – like there’s more pressure to capture them when they’re growing so fast?
That’s EXACTLY what I was thinking! Like, maybe once I have kids some recessive Mad Mom Memory Keeper gene will kick in me and I’ll want to record every eye blink, every burp, every giggle. Certainly with my nephews I feel like I could stare at them all day, haha. Photograph them every day? I’m not sure.
But see, I think that even IF I become that way about recording memories, I still won’t want to scrap EVERY bit of it, even in a Project Life style. Like you, I’d feel guilty if I started and didn’t finish a project, but if I just agreed with myself that my memory-keeping would be photos and words, I may still be able to keep the guilt at bay 🙂
And–just so it’s clear–despite my humorous poke above, this isn’t to generalize that only mom scrapbookers have guilt. Christine herself doesn’t have children 🙂 But consider this a humble two cents’ worth of opinion. 🙂
I totally agree that the chronological aspect of Project Life totally induces the guilt, even if Becky Higgins herself tell you not to feel guilty about getting behind. I feel it’s impossible to not feel guilty if you get behind with Project Life. I don’t feel guilty about any other aspect of scrapbooking, digi or paper, except for Project Life. When I did digi layouts regularly, they would be about random topics and things and I never felt bad about NOT documenting something with my pages.
Exactly Christine! I think it’s hard not to feel behind when you’re always trying to keep up. Which is why I don’t worry about scrapbooking chronologically in the first place, haha!
I think part of the reason that women, in particular, embrace scrapbooking in the first place is our need to multitask at everything we do. A purely selfish and unproductive hobby? Difficult to give ourselves permission to enjoy. But scrapbooking…hey, I can have some creative time but ALSO document memories and images for my family/friends/children. I have a feeling that this [often] unconscious thought process make it easier for a lot of women to really get involved in.
SO…because we feel as if our scrapbooking is something we feel as if we are doing FOR someone else, it is so easy to fall into the trap of thinking that NOT doing it is letting those people down. Not true, of course, but it happens in my brain, so maybe it works this way for others too?
I would definitely agree with this. When you put the extra pressure on yourself o “doing it for the good of the family”, you’re definitely adding guilt when you DON’T keep up with it. But it raises the question: why do women see doing things for themselves as “selfish” in the first place? I don’t personally feel that it is, but it’s definitely a common thread among women when it comes to spending money, time or anything else on only themselves. Why is there this need to justify doing something positive just for you?